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All posts in the Fruits of the Spirit Series

Once again here are the fruits of the Spirit as defined in Galatians 5.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23) {emphasis mine}

Truth in Gentleness

We so often seem to either be so determined to stand for truth that we are harsh and cruel in our criticism or we are trying so hard to not hurt people’s feelings that we don’t stand for the truth and end up encouraging people to continue in their sin to the detriment of their souls. Jesus, of course, struck the perfect balance.

The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman caught in adultery, and having set her in the center of the court, they *said to Him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in adultery, in the very act. Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women; what then do You say?” They were saying this, testing Him, so that they might have grounds for accusing Him. But Jesus stooped down and with His finger wrote on the ground. But when they persisted in asking Him, He straightened up, and said to them, “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again He stooped down and wrote on the ground. When they heard it, they began to go out one by one, beginning with the older ones, and He was left alone, and the woman, where she was, in the center of the court. Straightening up, Jesus said to her, “Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “I do not condemn you, either. Go. From now on sin no more.” (John 8:3-11) {emphasis mine}

You’ll notice in this passage that the religious leaders didn’t actually care about right and wrong or the good of the woman caught in adultery. If the woman was caught in the very act of adultery, where was the man involved in the act? They were trying to get a political win. They were destroying this woman’s life to make a point and to put Jesus in an uncomfortable position.

Jesus, on the other hand, cared about the good of the accusers and the good of the accused. He didn’t argue or condemn, but He did defend the truth and God’s law. When He “agreed” with the Pharisees about God’s law, he also made a point by saying “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” The Pharisees knew God’s law. He didn’t have to lecture them. He just threw out “He who is without sin among you …” He let their own conscience condemn them. It wasn’t necessary to spend a bunch of time arguing over the law because they knew the law and they knew their own sin natures.

With the woman caught in sin, he was merciful, but He also was clear, “From now on sin no more.” There was no mistaking God’s command, but He didn’t brow beat her, instead, He made it clear what was acceptable behavior.

When we correct people it should always be done in gentleness and mercy and for the good of the person being corrected. It should not be for the purpose of winning an argument or browbeating a person into submission. That isn’t the the gentleness to which Jesus calls us.

“Blessed are the gentle, for they shall inherit the earth. (Matthew 5:5)

Jesus promised to bless those who were gentle. Yes, we are called to stand firm on God’s word, but we are not to use God’s righteousness to beat people into submission. On the other hand we are always to be truthful about God’s commands. It isn’t doing anyone a favor to be comfortable in their sin.

For we also once were …

Remind them to be subject to rulers, to authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good deed, to malign no one, to be peaceable, gentle, showing every consideration for all men. For we also once were foolish ourselves, disobedient, deceived, enslaved to various lusts and pleasures, spending our life in malice and envy, hateful, hating one another. But when the kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared, He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit, (Titus 3:1-5)

One thought that can help us be gentle while standing firmly on God’s word is to remember that we were not born perfect or even saved. As Titus says, “For we also once were …” We may not have been guilty of the exact sin that we are trying to correct, but we were/are guilty of sin, just as they are. We were either uninformed about God’s law and/or defiant towards God’s commands. Just as God was merciful towards us and sought our best, so also we should be merciful and seek the best for the sinners around us.

A gentle answer turns away wrath,
But a harsh word stirs up anger.
The tongue of the wise makes knowledge acceptable,
But the mouth of fools spouts folly.
…
A soothing tongue is a tree of life,
But perversion in it crushes the spirit. (Proverbs 15:1-2,4)

Let Your Gentle Spirit be known

When a person feels attacked, they generally fight back no matter how good your argument is. When a person feels loved and treated with respect, they are usually willing to listen to what you have to say and willing to consider your point of view.

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice! Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. (Philippians 4:4-5)

It is amazing how a gentle word makes a person willing to listen.

When I was in college, I worked one summer for a bank. Half of the summer I was helping in lending and half of the summer I was helping in collections. The collections half was the hardest job I’ve had to do because I always was uncomfortable talking to strangers on the phone, but it was good for me.

I guess you could say, I talked in a gentler tone than many of the collection agents that did this job full time, and especially those who called those who were consistently months behind on their loans, but the difference between harsh and gentle came out in this situation.

I called one guy who was late on his payment and was regularly late. His first response was to give an excuse, but I had every excuse he had ever made in my computer. I gently corrected his excuse and reminded him that he had promised to pay the loan. He responded that I was the nicest collection agent he had ever spoken to, (It sounded like he got a lot of these calls) and he said, “If every collection agent was as nice as you are, I just might pay my bills.” This guy was far from a a good member of society, but even he responded well to gentleness, and he at least paid that month’s bill to us (probably instead of paying someone else). Gentleness, with firmness, encouraged him to do what was right. Something similar can happen with spiritual matters as well.

So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. (Colossians 3:12-13)

When those around us act in a hateful fashion, are dishonest, or are inconsiderate, instead of getting mad, we need to look at the heart of the person. A bad situation never excuses sin, but it is not uncommon to find this person had a horrible home life, is having problems at work, just got mistreated by someone, or some other difficult situation. If we see their hurt and their need for Jesus, it is much easier to be forgiving and to give a gentle answer. If we are looking at our own feelings and desires, it is easy to get offended and respond in a manner that is not helpful and which we may regret.

Preserve the Unity of the Spirit

Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as also you were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all who is over all and through all and in all. (Ephesians 4:1-5)

Being gentle in our response to others not only aids our witness, but also aids the unity of the church. God calls Christians to be one body with Jesus and with the Church. We are called to act in concert with each other in carrying out God’s will. Too often Christians argue with each other over trivial things, i.e. the color of the church’s carpet or the style of music, or they implement correction in a harsh style, or even worse, they talk behind the person’s back. This is not for the good of the church and should be avoided at all costs.

Jesus was merciful, generous, and gentle with us. This is yet another way we need to be more like Christ.

The Lord’s bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will. (2 Timothy 2:24-25)

This is the attitude to which God calls us: “to not be quarrelsome,” to “be kind to all,” to be “patient when wronged,” and to have “gentleness correcting.” All of these are incorporated into the fruit of the Spirit, gentleness.

Also important is the result of this Godly gentleness. It can bring about “repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil.” Isn’t this our goal? Isn’t it worth subverting our will and pride so that we can be gentle, leading to other’s “escape from the snare of the devil?”

I think so.

Zealous for Good

Who is there to harm you if you prove zealous for what is good? But even if you should suffer for the sake of righteousness, you are blessed. And do not fear their intimidation, and do not be troubled, but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence; (1 Peter 3:13-15)

God wants us to be “zealous for what is good.” He blessed the descendants of Aaron because they zealously dealt with sin.

Then the Lord spoke to Moses, saying, “Phinehas the son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the priest, has turned away My wrath from the sons of Israel in that he was jealous with My jealousy among them, so that I did not destroy the sons of Israel in My jealousy. Therefore say, ‘Behold, I give him My covenant of peace; and it shall be for him and his descendants after him, a covenant of a perpetual priesthood, because he was jealous for his God and made atonement for the sons of Israel.’ ” (Numbers 25:10-13)

On the other hand, as 1 Peter 3:13-15 says, “…if you prove zealous for what is good … yet with gentleness and reverence.” We shouldn’t let our emotions get the best of us. We need to stand for what is good, but be gentle towards others and have reverence towards God. Having the perfect balance isn’t easy, but when achieved, it stands out and calls people to Jesus in a way that is hard to comprehend.

Who among you is wise and understanding? Let him show by his good behavior his deeds in the gentleness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth. (James 3:13-14)

Wisdom and understanding are only useful when they are lived out “by … good behavior” and when they are communicated “in the gentleness of wisdom.” “Bitter jealousy and selfish ambition” lead us and others away from the truth and away from a relationship with Jesus.

Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:1-2)

When someone around you is guilty of any trespass, we want to correct them gently so they are restored into fellowship rather than shamed and pushed away. We also need to consider ourselves so we are not also tempted to sin.

We need to consider that we all have strengths and weaknesses. It is easy to criticize another, who is weak where we are strong, while missing the fact that this person may be strong where we are weak. Most of us are bad about criticizing another and not allowing excuses. At the same time, we are making excuses for where we are weak and fail miserably. When we have a proper view of our sin nature, we are less likely to have a “better than you” attitude which leads to a lack of gentleness in our correction. If we understand that we too are sinners, then we can gently correct with a humble spirit.

Be truthful but gentle, just as Jesus was truthful and gentle.

Trust Jesus.

FYI, my following posts will continue going through each of the individual fruits of the Spirit listed in Galatians 5

Bible verses are NASB (New American Standard Bible) 1995 edition unless otherwise stated